Jon Snow Alive – Spoiler Alerts

R.R. Martin Reveals Game of Thrones Spoilers in Drunken Voicemail to friend

Game of ThronesIn a drunken, rambling voicemail left to his old editor, R.R. Martin revealed three spoilers about the upcoming Game of Thrones new season.

The first and most pressing of course is that Jon Snow is still alive.

“I’m gonna resurrect him (Jon Snow) in the first episode back,” slurred Martin. However, fans should not get too excited because Martin immediately followed that with, “But then I’m going to kill him again at the end of that very same episode. Why? I dunno, mostly just to piss people off. I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I get a sick joy from making people love characters and then killing them. I think it’s because my Dad used to make me watch him torture squirrels.”

Martin also noted that the HBO sports mokumentary Seven Days in Hell about a week-long tennis match starring Kit Harrington was only made so that they could pay Kit Harrington for the upcoming season of Game of Thrones without putting him on the billing.

The second spoiler is that Arya becomes a man.

“I want to make sure that I’m really, really (sounds of vomiting into bucket) socially aware in the series,” said Martin. “So with all the attention Kaitlyn Jenner has garnered. I’m going to make Arya have a sex change and become a man. But then he’s going to get raped. Repeatedly. By his crippled brother or some other way that’s really messed up.”

The third spoiler is that Daernys has sex on her dragon.

“I don’t know if it’s really a spoiler but I’m going to write it. Who and why is not important. I just think some sex on a dragon sounds spectacular,” said Martin.


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